Where to start...

{View over Pattaya from my room}

I think, think, I have some sort of words for what I experienced in Pattaya, Thailand. This whole experience has been an emotional roller-coaster. Everything I felt, heard, smelled, tasted... it assaulted my every sense. I knew I was sheltered...but this much? How was I so completely clueless that something so horrific was going on in my world? It rocked my world - turned it upside-down. 2 second blips of moments, images, experiences, smells - roll constantly through my mind, even while I sleep. I haven't been able to escape it or shake it.....But I don't think I want too. I want to remember the eyes I looked into; I want to remember the unforgiving humidity; I want to remember the noises that haunt me; I want to remember the lives that have been sold; I want to remember the hope that is being given; I want to remember the lives that are being changed; I want to remember the generation that is being transformed. I will not forget. I will not turn my back. I have never been so ready to go to war.

{Walking Street}
It is so difficult to even begin to explain everything - even in a way so that you may have a hint of an idea of what is going on over there. Even for Chris - the first night I was home, we were sitting on the couch after we had put the kids to bed, he pulled out my camera and began flipping through the images..."So is that a prostitute? Is that a prostitute...?" After the 10th time of asking that same question, I put down the camera and said - you don't get it: everyone you see is for sale. It is right there - in your face. But it's illegal. ILLEGAL. HOW IS THIS OK?

{Walking Street}

There is SO MUCH MORE. But I think this is all I can do for today. Processing these images, alone, has been heart-wrenching. I find myself sobbing just looking at them. But I am constantly reminded of why I am fighting for these people. They need me. I can do this. WE can do this!

This song was written in a bar in Pattaya.
About Pattaya.
It is so true!